The Life of Joan & Victor Penney
Standing in front of the final resting place of our loving parents, Joan and Victor Penney, brings heartache and tears, but it also calls us to remember the happy times and all the memories we were so fortunate to make with them—and the memories we will continue to make because of them.
We are here today to celebrate their lives: the lives they lived, the life they shared with others, the lessons they taught us along the way, and everything we will continue to carry with us until we see them again.
Mom and Dad had a love like no other. They were truly each other’s soulmates, balancing one another perfectly—a match made in heaven, that’s for sure.
Dad loved Mom in a very vocal and outward way. He often spoke of her beauty and how, when he first laid eyes on her in that long yellow dress with a slit up the side, he knew she was his one and only true love. He shared stories of swimming across the bay just to see her and be with her. Dad made it clear that Mom was always his top priority, and even in his final days he wanted to make sure she would be okay and well cared for. He spoke of having lived a great life and felt deeply fortunate for Mom, his children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and his loving family and friends. He was content when he left this world. He said he had no regrets and felt he had been one of the lucky ones.
Mom, on the other hand, was less vocal but showed her love, care, and adoration for Dad in countless ways. She always made sure he was well taken care of, doting over him like a mother hen. She loved his sideburns and made sure he smelled nice by dousing him with cologne. Dad always said she used a whole bottle—those were his words—but he wore it just for her. Mom also knew Dad’s love for food, and when we children tried to say he couldn’t have something because of his diabetes, she would say, “That’s a sin—give him some.” She wanted him to be happy and to enjoy his life. Mom always said Dad was the only one for her and that without him she would be lost. After Dad passed, so many times Mom would ask, “What am I going to do without your father?”
Mom and Dad loved each other dearly, but they also had unconditional love for their children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, their parents, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, and all their family and friends.
They taught us so many life lessons: how to love, how to respect others, how to care deeply, how to never think one person is better than another, how to never give up, how to work hard, how to show up for each other, how to move through hard times together, and how to love deeply.
The most precious gift Mom and Dad could have given us is the family we have. Without each other, we would not have made it through the tears and heartaches of these past few years.
The night before Mom passed, I lay in her bed and went through each sibling, their spouses, and their children, telling Mom they loved her and that they were going to be okay. I told her we would take care of each other, that she could rest and didn’t have to worry. That she and Dad had done their job, had been the best parents possible, and that we would take it from here. Mom passed peacefully early the next morning, knowing that while a huge part of our family was gone with the passing of her and Dad, she also knew we would be okay—because we had each other.
Mom and Dad are looking down on all of us here today with such pride and love. If they could leave us with some words of advice, Dad would say:
Eat the piece of carrot cake. Always say “I love you.” Never go to bed angry. Show up at the airport with bells around your neck. Cook more than enough and invite a stranger to your table. Be humble and kind. Work hard. Stand up for what is right. Make a funny face for all pictures. Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t—because you can do anything you put your mind to. Talk to the ravines. Never underestimate how much you can pack into the back of a truck. Root for the underdog. Measure twice, cut once. You can never do too many house sketches. Take time to play a game of crib. Go fishing and hunting. Be proud of where you came from. And be there for one another.
Mom would say:
There is no such thing as too much bling. Check in on one another. Watch The Price Is Right, even if you’ve already seen the same episode a hundred times. Family comes first. You can never burst too many bubbles. If it’s expensive, buy it. Take pride in hard work—like shoveling snow for hours so you have a clean driveway. Put on your jewelry and perfume even if you’re staying home all day. Watch all the kids’ hockey games. Make bread just because others love it. Do a jig on the front step when you hear your favorite song. Bless yourself when you pass a graveyard or church. It’s okay to bathe in holy oil. Montreal is, by far, the best hockey team. Sit by the ocean just to hear the waves. Eat ice cream every day. Don’t take anything for granted. Always say, “Please God.” And know that I love you, hunny bunny bunny rabbit.
Mom and Dad would remind us to live our lives to the fullest. While we have no control over how many days we have left on this earth, we do control how we choose to spend the days we are given.
Love you, Mom and Dad. We know you will always be near—watching over us and sending us little signs to remind us you are never far.
A Life Well Lived
A life well-lived is a precious gift
of love and warmth and grace
Of hands that shaped our family and hearts that held this place
Nan and Pop were the soul of us
The roots that held us strong
With Stories, laughter, gentle care and love that carried on
They started life in Newfoundland Then made their home up North
In Labrador, where love ran deep And a Family that grew forth
Nan tended on folks in Long Term care and shovelled snow with Might
Pop sat to the table with blueprints crafting dream homes late at night
We think of you with love today
But that ls nothing neu we think of you so often now And feel your presence too
In precious memories that we share
Nan blessing loaves oF Homemade bread with gentle love & Care
Pop sneaking sweets with a wink &
a grin
strong and wise through Thick and thin
He cherished meals with all ot us,
The celebration and The cheer
Nan would say "Please God" with hope
to see us all next year
They gave us strength and
Kindness
And memories Sweet and deep
A cup or tea, a slice of toast Small comforts we will remember most
Though we miss you more than words can say
We feel you every day
In the salt sea air
In stories told
In love that finds its way
Your memory is our Keepsake With which we'll never part
Though wecant hold you in our arms
We hold you in our hearts
So as we lay you down today
We thank you
both with love
For the legacy you gave to us still guiding
- love Joanna